it’s weird how british people say “lift” instead of “elevator” and how my dad says “you are a dissappointment” instead of “i love you”
i hate small talk
tell me about how lonely you are or tell me about why you keep waking up in the morning or talk to me about your mum’s eyes and your dad’s laugh. I don’t care about the weather and you don’t care about how my job’s going.
what if squidward was a rapper and after all of his songs he went “squid. word”
*has a son* *names him 1k* *punches son* guys I hit 1k